TIMESHIFT_Short and concise:
I am back, a bit different though– I have done (still am doing) a lot of reflection. At times when I withdraw, I can see the big picture and then wait for the right time to act, respond, and share.
It is clear that the timelines have shifted, as has my attention. The way I will spend my energy (Qi, Prana, Breath) is only focused on what can be regenerative, which means vessels that are not ready to receive will not benefit from the encounter, for they won’t be able to realize, see, feel, or sense anything missing– so no need to sweat it. If you are still here reading, there must be something about our relationship that still calls for your attention, so thank you!
R-Evolving Cycles:
At the end of the last summer, I made a commitment to myself, and it has started to bear fruit already; as I entered another cycle in the spiral, I felt I was evolving in the manner in which I related to my needs after all the Lunar nodes made certain I would focus on the Taurus side of the action, while the Scorpio end was confronting, and shedding.
I hate stereotypes– the moment I sense a definition, my impulse is to fly away, to dismiss it… and yet last September, due to unforeseen events, I jumped on the boat of “Why not?”
-Why not try what gives me MORE fear?
Yeah! The invitation was coming from a place full of light, but I needed to trust my instincts and intuition inside the threshold, to be certain of one thing only: I would not create expectations, yet I would work with “deep-felt intentions”.
-And what are those, Monika dear? You are starting to sound cryptic!
Let me unpack– I looked back at all the so-called “crazy things” I did in my life that lead me here, and all of them have SOME things in common:
-Courage
-Curiosity
-Wit
-Endurance
-Transformation
-Self-inquiry
-Perseverance in research/learning/education
-Knowing when cycles have ended
Hereditary responsibilities
-Help your siblings, hold their hands, show them how…
-Yield to their needs, you are faster and smarter…
Blah, blah, blah. I have been taking on responsibilities that were not mine. Many of them I inherited without asking, or I jumped into, because I knew what was needed, due to conditioning I did not know I had!!!
At least that was what I was made to believe– the way I was conditioned was that because I can and I am able, I MUST take care of others. NO!
Close your eyes and imagine two puppet hands near your face: one says I WANT; the other screams I NEED. Well, these hands come at me, for me at all times, and I now have a choice to engage or not.
The co-dependent cycle explained by my astrology
That was the codependent cycle right there. There1 is a repeating theme of a lack of boundaries (emotional, nonetheless) and the willingness to learn to discern how to relate to others, including intimately, so I can be individuated and become free from attachments, addictions, and codependent relationships with people, situations, and things.
I learned to say a hard “NO!"
Another aspect is2 my relationship values, which are supporting my creative, joyful, colorful outtakes, and my lust for life, with awareness, smells, textures, and beauty all around.
The path from traumatic past lives3, while connecting to peers, was not equal; I feel at times I could have been a tyrant, leading to betrayals and an emotional, mental, and even physical dissociation as a protective response. Having dealt with Trauma diligently, I have turned the current direction towards a creative and emotional liberation, which is in 2/3rds of the way.
I am intense! I know it, and the emotional path is the destination4 – so having learned how to operate with an emotional authority, has been MAJOR. Emotions are waves, and they have amplitude and magnitude; they operate like sound, and their frequency can be adjusted by tuning in or out of certain vibrational schemes:
-How does X, Y, or Z me feel? That is always a key question for me.
Here I am in this life, taking care of the way I relate to myself FIRST, informing how this gives me leverage to relate to others, and last but not least, how I can contribute to a community.
My outlook is that I am very driven5, and my intensity and commitment are energized by my curiosity to educate myself and inspire others. The writing flows, and so do the images– it is in the synthesis and the amalgam where I thrive.
The Hands of Needs & Wants: Noise versus Signal
I have a radar to know what is needed and wanted– does that mean I have to supply it?
Perhaps, only if it feels correct to engage in a situation where the other vessel is accountable and willing to commit herself, then, and only then, can I open up a channel to be extremely caring.
Now that I have detached from those pesky hands, I have so much time… left for what??
EXPLORATION: these past weeks, when the noise was off, I could listen to the signal. I have committed to a couple of challenging yet exciting practices, which connect and keep being supportive of my expansive aura (which intimidated many). Somehow being an initiator and a manifestor comes with some pain and lots of goodies.
COMMITMENTS: a dot connects to a line, and another line creates dimensions– the sound of an almost unperceived frequency generates a sine line that validates concrete matters; emotions can be shaped in forms, and words may acquire utility down the line. I am being cryptic for a reason.

"The concept of investigating the universe, which you’re in, without investigating the self, is a flaw."
–Nassim Haramein
Tabula rasa? Pinakis Agraphos?Virtues are my support system
Is it all brand new? Mmm… not really. But every time I close a big cycle it feels like that; after all, it has been 3 years since I RAN AWAY from NYC, took the helmet off that had shaped me, and moved to the sunshine state, where I live barefoot…
When I think of the ways I was able to fulfill dreams, I know that the trinity of intention, attention, and presence was the most solid of them all.

I abide by a virtue per year, making it meditation for its duration.
Back in 2019, I started with the virtue of being kind to myself [KINDNESS]- to notate how I would address my inner chatter. I started with something simple– a muscle that gave me strength (smiling when alone) and thus I was in automatic kindness mode towards others.
This lead me to [GRATITUDE] in 2020; even before the lockdown, I was grateful for the exuberance of the kindness, I felt increased gratitude focused my attention to the present moment and surrendering to what is, and the capacity to be joyful about it.
2021 arrived and my life was already showing signs of metamorphosis, thus [HUMILITY] would be the virtue that I encountered by accepting that which I did not know yet, and by not faking it anymore.
- I learned to ask questions and allowed the space for learning completely new things and venturing into new territories.
As 2022 arrived I chose [HONESTY], which taught me to stay in the course of objectivity when needed and allow the interpretation of being mindful of distorted elements, which may arise in relational values when emotional needs are yet to be met.
This year has been about [GENEROSITY], thriving in well-being, and inspiring others to reconnect to the abundance that is inherent in the spirit.
I have also been focused on treating trauma and getting educated on how to relate wholesomely with my needs as well as those needs of close relationships and communities I interact with.
At this point of this beautiful journey, these virtues are a solid support structure that I can connect to at anytime
I feel good!
Preferred soundtrack: Tabula Rasa, Arvo Pärt
Inquiries:
-Are you ready to jump into the void, so you can trust the way you relate to your needs?
-What are your intentions for the next 18.6 months? Long-, mid-, short-term?
-How do they feel? (Staying with the feeling, for instance– freedom is major for me. I already feel and behave as if I am free from all kinds of burdens: X, Y, and Z.)
AI: “It’s against my programming to impersonate a deity” ~C-3PO
About the AI article I was writing about… it is still cooking, in fact, it was that rabbit hole that led me to take a break and enjoy my natural life. So it will come soon, unannounced!
Pluto in Virgo's 8th house, which rules my Moon, is in Scorpio falling in my 9th house, in a dissolving relationship to Neptune on the MC; Uranus in my 7th house, also in a closing aspect to Pluto in Virgo, opposes Saturn at early degrees of Pisces in my 1st house.
The South Node in the 11th house is ruled by Saturn, and my North Node in Cancer is in my 5th creative house, where Venus (relational values) in Gemini likes to be curious and play– this Venus rules three of my planets in Taurus, Jupiter, the Sun, and Mercury RX.
The 11th house is Aquarian, and Uranus rules my moment-by-moment impulse of living (my ascendant).
The Moon in Cancer rules my North Node, at 60 degrees of my Taurus planets, and Uranus while it makes a trine to Saturn. This year the astrology transits have been generous to me.