I Discern with Intuitive Wholeness
Full moon in Virgo, a culminating season before Aries initiates!
I wrote the new moon in Virgo intentions back in September 2021, now with the culmination of the full moon, I look back and observe the process — I whisper my feelings about this process on the video “I AM NOT PERFECT!*
Journal entry: 09.09.21 9:47 am: On projections, values, and commitments.
I have spent the last weeks naturally observing certain patterns I have wanted to address and correlate to current experiences that are felt so strongly (yes, the constant inner critic that at times takes over my psyche in ways that can only be described as obsessive.)
The invitation was clear: to observe the moment I give my power away and in turn create a codependency or project an idea of an external need to either feel needed, appreciated or even validated.
This refers to Venus, Taurus, second house, Venus, Libra, 7th house and Scorpio, Pluto, 8th house archetypes, mainly, although there are references of Leo, Sun, 5th house elements here.
Since observation has been the main practice, I have been seeing, noting, giving space to pay attention to some repeating underlying patterns, and by noticing these I started creating relationships (connecting nodes), like when a private detective is finding clues that can reveal something that needs to be “discovered” or brought to light.
Let me start with projections and how light is the source, yet the surface will determine the quality of what will be projected and how this projection will be revealed. A projection in real waking life is a relationship, not necessarily romantic, an intimate 1:1 with something, a relation to a situation or to someone. It becomes the surface in which the “I” is projecting onto the other, the “you” or “it”.
Pause here- the other is not the I? Or is it?
The other may feel as if it is another entity, but most of the time when it is unconscious, it is just the surface of an expectation, which, alas, is bound to become an unmet need, a frustration, and/or a deception.
“What was I thinking?” is a question one might ask. Or “How did I not see this coming? I thought I knew it.”
For values and needs: (mine) I have taken some time to ponder, as I would like to clarify where I will put my energy in the following months.
Three core values in my life seem to be constant–
One: I value deep, evolutionary processes and commitment to “know myself”- any practice that relates to this journey, I intend to put all my energy, resources, and attention there. My 2nd house is ruled by Pisces where I also have Chiron, and it is also the polarity point of my Pluto on the 8th house. I value connection to source, getting deep into the understanding “All is One”, caring for resources as much as for dreams and imagination.
I value serving with my own vulnerabilities. I find that with having routines and being detailed, it is critical to surrender with discernment. The 6th house is ruled by the emotional sign of Cancer that gives me an inner sense of authority by using discernment when I surrender to what is.
Two: Beauty. I value materiality, I value how my spirit is capable of perceiving this material realm and can appreciate its sensuous manifestation. I also feel that in order to evolve in this plane, how one manifests through flesh and the emotional body is a very important navigation tool– the shadows, colors, smells, textures, sounds, and capacity to vocally express via the senses will allow the emotions a platform to sense and thus connect to a deeper urge to fulfill the desire to evolve in which the soul has partaken. My 3rd house, where you can find Mars in Aries and Jupiter, the Sun, and Mercury Rx in Taurus, makes me very curious and open to stepping out of radical fixed ideas and opening space to initiate new connections. I intend to live where, with creative expression, I can make meaningful connections. Taurus rules my 4th house, where I feel safe and contained in beautiful and sensuous environments.
Third: I value freedom. Freedom of expression, freedom of choice, sovereignty. To know that I can fulfill my creative self, self-actualize, tend to my needs, and not depend on external approvals that can create addictive behaviors or codependencies that will forfeit my independence. The scope is to generate situations where I can be in interdependent relationships- thus being of service with joy. Being an Aquarius rising supports (1st house) this quest for freedom. I am wary of what makes me tick for freedom; I just create the right relationship to establish those boundaries and relate. Having Venus in Gemini on my 5th house along with my North Node of the Moon in Cancer means my emotional needs find a way to be expressed creatively by being curious and finding a sense of joyful service. I intend to choose where and how to put my energy as an investment to commitments.
Synthesizing these three factors which integrate my core values led me to the following:
I will only engage with people or situations that have the same capacity of commitment and compromise towards themselves as they can have towards our relationship. I am revising my commitments with all engagements.
Who do I support?
Where do I put my resources?
Who values and supports my work?
How are these relationships fulfilling the three values?
Are they deepening and or challenging my evolutionary trajectory?
Are they embellishing or activating my felt sense to create meaningful responses?
Are they giving me the freedom to express and self-actualize?
Deep breath.
You did well, Monika!
Clarity brings serenity…
Aware of Where I Place My Energy
My Human Design is a 6/2 profile, they call it the Role Model. I call it I Am Who I Am.
I am
Not I do, or
I have to
Therefore when I interact, I inspire.
Yet, if I invest in fighting for, I am losing the point…
Notes from today (March 17, 2022):
With the culmination of this full moon cycle, the Sun will be in Aries soon, with Jupiter in there, briefly. It is time to embrace courage and initiate a new way, plant a seed, and take care of it. As humans, we’re way past the shock, “This is it”. Life goes on, and I welcome the warrior in me, that protects my own dominion, which is the ‘self’, my own evolution. It’s now six months after I made those intentions and I managed to fulfill them, so Bravo Monika!
I feel we’re living in a very different world though. Nevertheless, I’m ready, I have the tools, I’m ready to respond, however, I can, on a day-to-day.
-Peace on Earth starts within…
You will find all the links about my artwork, my astrology sessions + interviews + articles + more: my link.tree and my integrated bio
*I AM NOT PERFECT! — Full moon in Virgo VIDEO: